Yeah, sure, I’ll intin the intin once I know what the hell you’re talking about…
What is it with people?! There they are -masters of an ancient, varied, deep and multi-layered language that conveys a rich culture and people, yet they mumble, smudge and intin their way through life- at home, at work, at church, in the market, trivial chit-chat or serious conversations. INTIN (*!!) turns up everywhere! It’s a manifestation of how badly we communicate in Ethiopia, we hardly care to express precise measurements of time, distance, quantity or quality. Ask how long the pen-pusher you have to see (the 7th you’ve had to see this morning just to get some simple little thing done) will be in his “meeting” you’ll get a breezy “Ahun yimeTal, tinish qoyi…” 30 minutes into your warming the fake leather seat you venture the same question- you get the same answer… I wonder how long you can carry on like this without your opposite sensing the idiocy of what you’re both doing. As for distances- oh boy! What is just “7” km away or “Ezih qirb new” turns out to be a bumpy, dusty ride for 1.5 hrs!
Some examples:
No 1: Day at the office (a hypothetical example collated over time, names changed to respect privacy):
Legesse: “Ya ye intinu woreqet indet hone, Kasse?”
Kassaye (absentmindedly): “Huh?”
L: “Ya mindinew, manewsimu balefew inkuan amTito alTeyeqenem?”
K (still absentminded): “Huh?”
L: “Ya mindinew, manewsimu balefew inkuan amTito alTeyeqnem?”
K (in dreamland now): “Huh?”
L (shouting in the general direction of the secretary’s office): “Manesh, Intina, erh, Mulunesh, ya ye intinu woreqet indet hone, manewsimu yametaw?”
K (suddenly alert): Bakih tinish qes bel, min yasTChohal?”
Etc etc etc- drives me nuts! I’m sitting there knowing L means an evaluation report handed in on Monday morning by Hassen from the Partner’s offices with the request for comments before the final draft is out…! Not that I am sharp or too clever for my job (far from it) but come on! It’s just not efficient nor effective, the breath wasted on all these vacuous conversations must be what’s steaming up England!
So is that how people high up, be it government, business enterprises or NGOs really (non)communicate? It is worse over the phone because you cannot fix your opposite with a hypnotic stare, forcing them to take in your words, and give a coherent reply.
No 2: Another popular Ethiopian Oratory Specialty is the “Dialogus Interuptus”:There you are OBVIOUSLY having a talk with someone, be it on the telephone or in the flesh, when the Interruptor walks in and stats talking to either one of you, insisting you notice them, calling your name over and over, and it begs the question: “CAN’T YOU F***ING SEE????” Our mouths- they are moving, sound is coming out of our throats and our eyes- they are turned to each other, this isn’t some elaborate burp-contest you can come and interrupt! The second variety is where your dialoguing partner does the interrupting, casually butting a few words into your flow that makes it plainly clear that he hasn’t got a clue what you’re on about because –hey! He hasn’t been listening to anything you’ve been saying ‘cos he was busy with formulating that same question.
No 3: The “Lost Direction”
Assumptions for this: This person knows Addis Ababa well enough to distinguish between, say, Old Airport Mekanissa and Old Airport Tor Hayloch; you speak the same language and they are not deaf.
So make an appointment with person above to meet at Mesqel square/ Abyot on the Debre Zeyt Road side, just round the corner from Debre Zeyt Road- see what happens then… they might be by St. EsTifanos Church, half way down Bole Road, behind the Stadium or in Debre Zeyt itself… Why? Try something simpler such as the Arat Kilo Campus main entrance- oh Boy! You could end up with 4kg of Oranges from the Etfruit in Churchill Avenue as a gift… The best is when that person then treats you like the moron who got mixed up. Help!
Then there are the half-truths, the outright lies, the omissions, the slips, the misnomers, the mispronunciations - the unending maze that is communication in Ethiopia.
Anyway, I’m not a language snob, I’m using these examples to illustrate a point: For Ethiopia to prosper we need to be able to communicate clearly with each other, convey our ideas, notions and perceptions clearly and, if possible, succinctly. Take a look at how teams work in countries where communication is largely free from such nonsense- I’m speaking of working environment communication, not a merry night out- the ideas fly and sparkle, a few key words and phrases being all it takes for a thought to be brought forth, discussed and proceeded on.
The closest communication in Ethiopia comes to this is the beautiful daily contact between, say, the Woyalla and the possible passenger- a nod, a flick of the head or the wrist, a finger or 2 or 3 held up, while at the same time sidestepping the hole in the pavement and shaking your head at a chewing gum vendor and frowning at some pesky nuisance trying to be “your friend”. You can even mouth your destination or wearily look at the guy- he knows it! Or when in a social situation: a means of dealing with Interruptors from above without yanking their tongues out is to give a quick answer mid-flow; it doesn’t have to be an interruptor, could just be another conversation near-by that you’ve been taking in whilst in a conversation yourself.
